Comments on: Minimum Play Players, Favoritism, & Parents

By: Steve Parker

Steve Parker — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 20:23:23 +0000

It is hard for parents to realize their child might not be as talented as other kids. This becomes evident in JR High and High School more because the funnel becomes narrower. We’ve trained ourselves in youth sports that everyone gets a trophy and gets play time. But at higher levels this is not the case. Only the best players play.

My oldest son is not playing on the Jr High A team. He plays B team. This upsets him and is frustrated. I told him to continue to work hard and he must become better than the starters on the A team. Otherwise he must quit complaining about not playing on A team.

I know its tough, but motivate her to continue to play, practice and train to get better so the coaches cannot ignore her. She must be great when she gets into the games or in scrimmages in the front of the coaches. If she is only average then the coaches will continue to play their favorite and trusted starters.

By: Cyndi

Cyndi — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 13:38:33 +0000

Wow, sounds like a lot parents are facing the same issues that I am! My grandaughter is on the JV girls basketball team, she has attended EVERY practice even in the first 2 weeks when they had practice 2 times a day every day, she would go in at 5:30am and again right after school. Last year she unable to play because during a practice she rolled her ankle and caused so much damage, surgery was required to repair it. She paid dearly for that injury, now she only gets time on the floor during practice, she does not get any time in the games, well a couple of games the caoch actually put her in for 54 seconds, Really? I have told her that she needs to talk to the coach to find out what she can do to get in the game, all he has told her is to look up more, It hasnt helped…….now he doesnt even work with her in practice, he pairs her off with a couple of other girls who not atletic at all, but are on there to be on the “team” and they don’t care if they play or not. My daughter says she can not get in a good practice because she isnt allowed to play and learn with the other girls. HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO DEAL WITH THIS AS A PARENT????? All she has ever talked about was playing basketball…..she is at the point of quitting, I keep telling her to stick it out, but she is getting so depressed over this. This is really a time when we just be worried about self esteem and other issues that teens face. She doesnt want me to talk to the coach because she says that is the worst thing I could do, that coahces do not want to be approached by a players parents, But I am at a loss here.

By: NOT A BIG NAME

NOT A BIG NAME — Sun, 16 Oct 2011 03:07:39 +0000

HIGH SCHOOL VARSITY FOOTBALL IN THE PRIVATE SCHOOLS IS AWFUL;. THERE ARE DOZENS OF PAID POSITIONS-THE PARENT’S CONTRIBUTION TO THE ATHLETIC BOOSTERS ASSOC. AND PLAYING TIME ARE DIRECTLY CO-RELATED. THIS CUSTOMARY PRACTICE GUARANTEES THE PARENTS AN OPPORTUNITY TO LOCK THEIR NON-ATHLETIC KIDS IN KEY SKILLED POSITIONS. AT ONE PARTICULAR SCHOOL, A NON-SKILLED COACH, HAS NUMEROUS 5’7-5’8 150-165 LB. PLAYERS IN A LINEBACKER POSITION. UNFORTUNATELY 90% OF THEM PLAY THE POSITION POORLY AND LACK THE SKILL AND ATHLETICISM TO FULFILL THE LB ROLE. THEY’RE UNABLE TO BLOCK, THEY CAN’T STOP PLAY IN THE SECONDARY AND THEY ARE MOSTLY INEFFECTIVE. AS A RESULT WHEN THEY PLAY CHALLENGING TEAMS, WHICH THEY TRY NOT TO, THEIR INADEQUACIES BECOME COMPLETELY EXPOSED TO THEIR PEERS, THE PARENTS AND EVERYONE WATCHING THE GAME. THE ENTIRE GAME THEY GET -BURNED, TRUCKED AND STRONG ARMED AND EVENTUALLY, INJURED. iT’S SUCH AN EMBARRASSMENT. BUT THEIR PROUD DAD’S ARE ON THE SIDELINES THINKING “LOOK AT MY KID”-HE’S A TROOPER.

****AS LONG AS THEY PLAY TEAMS THAT ARE NOT A CHALLENGE, THEY ARE AB LE TO GET BY WITH SUB-PAR PERFORMANCE. BUT WHEN THEY PLAY A CHALLENGING TEAM OR A TEAM WITH A FEW ATHLETES, THERE MASK IS REMOVED. THEIR LACK OF TALENT AND ABILITY IS COMPLETELY EXPOSED… AND IT’S NOT PRETTY!

. IT’S SAD WHEN YOU HAVE OTHER KIDS ON THE BENCH WHO ARE MORE ATHLETIC AND WHO BETTER FIT THE POSITION (SIZE, STRENGTH AND SPEED). THE SORRY KIDS PARENTS WANT THEIR SONS OUT THERE-NOT CARING THAT THEY ARE CAUSING THE TEAM LOSSES OR THAT THEY RISK INJURY AND THE BETTER PLAYERS COULD BE ON THE FIELD PERFORMING MUCH BETTER AND Better ASSISTING THE TEAM,.

THE OTHER PLAYERS ARE ALSO PUT IN A HORRIBLE SITUATION. THEY KNOW WHAT THEIR TEAMMATES ARE SAYING WHICH LEADS TO TEAM MEMBER RESENTMENT KILLING TEAM MORALE THUS AFFECTING TEAM PERFORMANCE. IT’S SUCH A LOSE-LOSE FOR ALL INVOLVED.

By: SDwyer

SDwyer — Mon, 03 Oct 2011 12:28:17 +0000

I have had just the opposite experience. My son was on the 8U team last year, they only lost 2 regular season games and many parents were horrible. This year on the 10U team we are 0 and 4 and the parents have been very supportive. One team we play has 4 10 year old kids that are over 200 lbs. The entire youth league organization in our town is, well, organization may be too strong a word for them. It’s more like a circle… I mean cluster… well it’s not very organized. We have had 6 games cancelled, we have only played on 2 weekends, yes that’s 2 games per day. But the parents have been supportive of the team, if not the youth league it’s self. But even though the minimum play according to the league is 2 quarters, we basically ignore it. If you want to get playing time work in practice. If you listen, and try you play, if you back talk, loaf and don’t try in practice you don’t play. The parents, so far have not had a problem with that.

By: Steve Parker

Steve Parker — Sun, 02 Oct 2011 18:59:20 +0000

After almost 20 years of coaching, at the end of the day a youth football team must win. Unfortunately parents on losing teams become unbearable to deal with as a youth football coach. So, I understand why coaches play the best players the majority of time. Everyone is feeling great until the team loses almost every game.

I’ve personally coached a development team, we rotated many players around and intentionally played players to gain experience. Unfortunately we lost all but one game. The players and parents were very disappointed in the coaching staff that season. The parents and players did not feel they learned anything. Winning sets the tone of the team. Losing = Everyone unhappy, Winning = everyone happy

12 plays during a youth game is usually one quarter of the game because a youth game is around 60 plays. The problem with your team is 30 players. Most leagues keep the teams at 20, our league keeps the teams at 16. So, more players get to play just by the size of the teams.

Another issue no one brings up is what is fair to the good players on the team. We were winning Saturday and took out our starters after mid 3 quarter. I had several starters upset and crying that they had to come out of the game. They did not understand that we wanted our other players to get game time.

In my opinion from experience coaching a development team, a team must play the best players on the team and sub as needed so the team wins. As a youth coach you just do not have enough time at weekly practices to develop players that do not respond and excel during normal practice hours.

Thanks
Coach Parker

By: Keith

Keith — Sat, 01 Oct 2011 22:05:01 +0000

Will you please coach my son’s team? We need more youth coaches with your kind of attitude towards skill and confidence development. Thanks for doing it the right way coach!!

By: Keith

Keith — Sat, 01 Oct 2011 22:00:51 +0000

Coach Parker, do you have the same opinion of playing time at the 8 year old level? My son gets his mandatory 12 plays every game and will never touch the ball this season, in scrimmages or games. He is athletic but there are 7 kids on the team that know the sport better and play every single play on both sides of the ball. The remaining 22 kids get their 12 mandatory plays at the less skilled positions. Does this seem like the correct thing to do at age 8?

Thanks,
Keith

By: Jimmy

Jimmy — Fri, 23 Sep 2011 00:58:50 +0000

My daughter goes to a strong high school program in her sport. The volleyball coach is not good coach, she is just lucky that this area has kids in some strong club programs an this coach just adopts the talent.
Speaking as a parent I do not favor my kids. This coach gives playing time to kids that go to her church and the other assistant coaches and current players can not stand up to her because they know if they did, then the coach would ban them in a second. The coach is not open to any conversations from the parents period. My daughter has been a starter on a very strong club team and was MVP on her JV team. She obviously is the strongest player in her position but has not had any playing time because my daughter does not kiss her butt. This coach finishes second in league every year but never improves in state matches because she plays enough to do well in a weak league, but you would think she would want to play the best players at thier position. not in this case, coach is a head case and athletic director does nothing to make sure the athletes that deserve to be playing are getting that chance. Its ashame to see phycos able to try to distroy a atheltes time in high school and jeperdising the kids future because
she just does not like your kid. Players on the team assistant coaches have told her they do not know why she is not starting or even playing over the kids in her postion. No one will stand up to the coach because they know they will not be on the team if that was to happen. And it has in the past.

By: Steve Parker

Steve Parker — Wed, 14 Sep 2011 02:35:51 +0000

Any position on the team that helps the team to win is a good move. Speed on the LOS is awesome, especially if he hits like a mack truck. He may try to use him as a DT that can contain also. So I would not worry about it yet.

One year, I moved a corner to one of my noseguards because he was so quick and had a great nose for the ball. It worked out great.

Have your son talk to the coach not you. Coaches like the players to talk to them about position changes. Give it a week or two and see what happens.

Thanks
Coach Parker

By: howard31

howard31 — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 23:08:10 +0000

My son is playing middle school football and he is 6’0 145 pounds and is the fastest 200 m hurdler in the State. He plays free/strong Safety and he hits like a Mack Truck but the Coach just moved him to defensive tackle but did not move any of the other skilled defensive players that are around his size speed. He asked the coach why he moved, and the coach said “we don’t need speed back there, but we need it close to the line and it’s not because you did a bad job at safety” I understand that you have to be a team player but is this move good for my sons football future considering he is not built like a lineman and never will be (Everyone in my family is tall and lean)? Should I express my concern to the coach?